Wednesday, November 23, 2005

20th Birthday

Finally, the big 20.

What have I achieved so far? Almost nothing noteworthy.. I want to do something big. But I lack the determination and the drive. So, just slack first lor. But I'll definitely make it big somehow. Big as in maybe doing something really helpful to others and getting really successful in my studies and career. Not now. But I promise myself it'll be done soon enough.

But these past years, I've learnt how to protect myself. How to stop others from taking advantage of me. I've learnt how to say No. How to stand up to someone. All these don't come naturally to me though. I remembered how I just couldn't say no to my friends when they needed something, but I needed that same thing too, and got scolded because I told teacher I didn't bring the stuff.

Also, I've learnt how to listen selectively. Things that you don't put to heart, you won't mind.

Besides, I've also learnt how to really differentiate the good friends from hi-bye kinda friends. I mean, you can really talk alot to this person, but that doesn't mean that this particular friend will be a true friend. Friendship is a big part of my life. But I don't mind having just a few true friends. Afterall, I'm myself, for most parts, the kind of hi-bye friend to others. The more effort I see my friends putting in to keep in touch with me, the more I'll treasure them.

Having said all these, it's really important for me not to lose my way in life. I want to remain being myself. I don't want to become selfisfh, nor do I want to become this fake person who goes around trying to make others like me. If I don't feel comfortable lending a person something, I'll try not to lend in future. Right now, I still can't really say no and then feel gd. It's always been uncomfortable for me to reject someone. In short, I want to be frank to others. I never did like fake people. And I really hope I won't become one. Cos, sometimes, I feel like I'm really fake. haha.. but luckily, it's quite rare..

Well, lets hope things go smoothly for me! Adulthood? Bring it on man!

6 comments:

Jinwei said...

yea as you get older you find it easier to say no...

me too.
i'm beginning to use my rank. Just scolded my men the other day.
haha. the influence the other specialists are giving me i guess, seeing how they tekan the recruits.

hey happy birthday dude, i await that great thing u have in mind. (or at the back of it anyway)

AdR|3LL3 said...

OMGOSH...and u said ur blog was private...meh...and happie birthday again and we'll have our alumni gathering soon...eh..dunno when..

ToOtsIe & ToOty said...
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ToOtsIe & ToOty said...
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gary said...

Hahaz soon, so you go organuse the gathering ya? =))

cos they lied, said...

the only time you ever truly feel fulfilled on the inside is when you demonstrate love.

i'm working at it too.